Pizza is a vitamin

Netnet Camomot

BEFORE leaving for S&R last Wednesday, I said, Okay, we’re buying vitamins only, nothing else.

But one brand of vitamins I was planning to buy was out of stock, so, I figured the budget for that could be used for other items. That inspired the push cart to roam around until it saw our favorite canned goods, our favorite peanuts, and some potentially yummy carbs. Oh, well. That’s why I don’t make New Year’s resolutions anymore. Para que? You list down some and a moment later, there you are, breaking one. Such a waste of pen, paper, and the time spent in choosing resolutions.

2018 will definitely be a year for sticking to what matters, though, despite the tendency to veer away from the diet.

Diet? What diet? Haha!

Canned goods, peanuts, and carbs are three of the food items I shouldn’t touch. That’s simply my personal, uh, choice and not some doctor’s advice. The senior moment immediately notices when it doesn’t agree with the food intake, add late nights—or worse, sleepless nights—to that and all the aches and pains “suddenly appear/Every time you are near.”

Sleep is supposed to be indulged in from 10 pm to 3 am. If you’re a feeling-young senior whose constant denial with age has convinced you to continue to morning-the-night, well, Cheers! Good luck na lang with the hangover that will require at least a two-day recuperation.

At the hotel’s breakfast buffet, having sikwate became a major decision. Should I, should I not, yes, no… A maybe is definitely not the right answer. A maybe for sikwate means taking a sip, swishing it in your mouth, and then spitting it out. Tsk tsk. Di tawon na wine tasting.

Of course, I said yes because puto maya and mango are best when paired with sikwate. Much like the way we said yes to the Tax Reform for Acceleration and Inclusion (Train). Wait, did we say yes to that? Was there an election on that? Were we given the chance to vote?

2018 is the year for Train to replace the old jeepneys. Ah, no, not that. The old jeepneys will be replaced by new jeepneys which don’t look like jeepneys. Unpolitically correct signs—such as “Basta’t sexy, libre; buntis, ‘no way’; ‘pag bakla, gulpe”—will be gone, too, I guess. Will the behavior of jeepney drivers improve, too? Hmmm. Abangan.

Meanwhile, the traffic in Cagayan de Oro is waiting to be solved, but that’s not shocking news at all—Manila has the “worst traffic on Earth” per Waze’s 2015 Global Satisfaction. With Cebu City also having its own Carmageddons, CDO is simply behaving like a typical Philippine city. Hopefully the tunnel to be built from here to Aparri and Jolo—hehe—will ease our city’s Carmageddons.

Yes, CDO will finally have its first ever tunnel to be built in 2019 and finished three years later—hmmm, 2022?—to cover the route from Agusan to Puerto. That is, if the plan will push through.

2022?! How old will the senior moment be by then? Oh, my.

While that tunnel patiently waits to be built, Cagayanons and CDO visitors and tourists have to always remember that patience is a virtue and road rage can only lead to more traffic woes.

Patience is slowly but surely. Learn to listen to your heart. Whenever you have to choose between sikwate and coffee, choose water instead. And whenever you have to choose between a certain individual and them, choose them—that individual is better off without your unsure loyalty.

January is always Realization 101 when it comes to taxes, with or without Train. The first working day of the year is the best time to learn about the total amount due, let reality bite ASAP so you’ll know the actual amount instead of fearing how much it would be.

There’s of course an increase again compared to 2017’s rates. Do you recall signing a contract with the government that your taxes will have an annual ten-percent increase? Of course you don’t remember because you didn’t sign any contract or even a piece of tissue paper.

And it’s this year you promised to empathize with people who say they struggle with their monthly budget so will you please understand their plight. But after seeing all the increases, hmmm, Goodbye, empathy.

The government should realize that an increase in taxes will always be passed on to the end consumer who remains ecstatic and grateful to Train for his exemption from income tax. Well, he can dream, can’t he?

There’s this saying, “You can’t buy happiness but you can buy pizza and that’s kind of the same thing.” Let that be a reminder for the end consumer who now has extra cash earned from the tax exemption: Make that money taste good by buying pizza at S&R.