Pre-Christmas

Netnet Camomot

I WAS wishing for a long weekend, with today, Nov. 2, as a non-working holiday. But it wasn’t meant to be. For a change, PNoy was bent on making his fellow Pinoys work, probably with the wish-ko-lang that the short weekend was enough to give them time to recover from the long and winding lines to the Comelec satellite registration venues.

The registration’s deadline was on Saturday, Oct. 31, and last-minute flying voters had to live up to their name–they believe they can fly!–in justifying their newly found snail mail addresses and barangays. But thanks to that miracle called biometrics, I’m sure the Comelec could now see the fakes from the facts in the documents that the new registrants brought with them, so, no need to worry?

Once they’re registered though, there’s no going back to their original barangay until the next registration that is, for which a transfer will require proof again. Whew. The life of a flying voter, er, transferee can be tiring, eh? And those lines! O my gas. Do you know what time they started lining up outside the mall where the satellite registration was held? The night before–they stayed overnight to be among those getting priority numbers that were distributed the morning after, starting at 6 am.

The sight of people lining up outside the mall at 11 pm brought back nightmarish memories of getting a US visa in the late ’90s, when visa applicants had to stay in hotels near the US Embassy and wake up early so they could join the long and winding line at 3 am. Those were trying times for those who wanted to visit the land of milk and honey and Brad Pitt.

Having the registration inside malls was a good decision–hello, aircon! Despite the blackouts that have been happening in Cagayan de Oro again since malls have generators anyway.

The days are still hot and humid, the Christmas weather is definitely not here yet. But Christmas has been in the air since September and in the haze in the last few weeks, with the tree downstairs now alive but not yet kicking as it waits for balls and trimmings to fall on its leaves.

Now that Halloween and the All Souls’ and All Saints’ Days are over, Pinoys can finally focus on Christmas and the pre-Christmas sales in malls and stores that keep reminding them to start buying gifts already. Simply copy-paste the word “Sale” with an exclamation point–Sale!–all over the mall, and insert the appropriate percentage–10%, 50%, 70%–and that’s enough to tempt any sale-addicted shopper to go shopping for bargains again even if the merchandise on sale were the exact same items that were on sale during the great sale on the weekend before that sale. Whew!

And to finally seal the deal, there’s the uptown mall’s raffle promo which could have any Apple product as its prize. That would ensure your constant shopping there so that you’re also buying furniture that’s on sale, the entertainment system that’s on sale, the materials needed for your house that’s still under construction, all your medicines and groceries and meals, the laundry basket, iron, ironing board, the school and office supplies, the books and magazines, the gift cards, greeting cards, Mass cards, even the popcorn and keys and health supplements, and so on and so forth ad infinitum ad nauseam.

It’s only when you’re there at the table for the raffle tickets that you realize how much you’ve spent in the uptown mall when the one in-charge tells you the total amount of your purchases. This could reveal the hierarchy of your priorities. If the amount makes your eyes twinkle, that means you’re an Apple fan and you don’t care what it entails to acquire one. If it makes your jaws drop to the floor, that means you’re an impulsive shopper and should now stay home until the feeling to shop passes.

But the amount does entitle you to hundreds of raffle tickets to be filled up by the non-ambidextrous hands that have already forgotten the art of handwriting, no thanks to the Apple products previously won in the uptown mall’s raffle draws. Shop pa more? For, aside from the great sale and the pre-Christmas sale, there’s the rewards card sale, the government-employee sale, the civic-organization-member sale. That last one can be tricky: they ask you to present a membership card. You say your organization doesn’t issue that but you do have pins as a member, director, club president, etc., and the cashier and clerk at the counter are like, Huh? But since you don’t wear those pins daily, is the discount enough to inspire you to go back home and get the pins? O my gas.

No wonder more gated villages have sprouted uptown when the mall opened. Kind of “Build it, and they will come.”

Meanwhile, there are other gated villages that seem “cannot be reached” due to the lack of malls nearby. But then, what can be more remote  than a blackout that’s still happening in the 21st century? What to do with an Apple product if there’s no power to empower it?

Today is your last chance to visit your dear departed loved ones. Surely, some concerned relative has noticed the absence of flowers and candles when they visited the family’s estate first. In case you haven’t noticed, there seems to be a contest in that department of who gets to visit first, with the flowers and candles as evidence. Oh well.