Weight loss secret

By Netnet Camomot

I HAVE a pair of Bobson jeans but it’s now in storage, waiting for the year when I’m finally back to its size.

I rarely give up on old jeans—what if I slim down to that size again. Because jeans never go out of style. Haven’t you noticed? Your oldest pair is the comfiest.

Bobson has been around for years but it was only during the opening of its Limketkai boutique in Cagayan de Oro that I learned it’s a Japanese brand. Ah, hehe. Talk of duh.

My first query of course was this: What’s your biggest size? For women, it’s size 34. Or was that 36? For men, I think they said 42.

There was a time, eons ago, when I relied on my suki sastre for my own personal jeans because the ones sold in CDO stores were never my right size—the hips would be OK, but with the waist having too much space for someone preggy; or the waist was OK, leaving the hips with no room to breathe. And there was World War III inside a store’s fitting room which, by the way, should change its name to Wish-Ko-Lang-It-Will-Fit Room, as I squeezed into jeans of smaller sizes, wishing one of them would be the right fit. The jean sizes then were 0 and below. Hehe.

And having your own personal jeans then meant you could choose the brand. Wink wink.

Nowadays, thanks to fast food outlets that have fattened the Pinay’s waistline, jean manufacturers have realized there’s a market for fat, er, voluptuous Pinays, thus, sizes have increased from 0 to infinity and beyond, er, to 34 or 36.

The Bobson boutique at LKK, however, has its own Tailor Shop (no, not Taylor Swift) but I guess it can’t create miracles, i.e., increasing the jeans’ size to my infinity-and-beyond hips.

According to some fashion experts, pear-shaped women like me are better off with bootcut jeans to flatter the look. Imagine this—mile-wide hips, slightly flared jeans below. There’s balance, right? Only a fat Jessica Rabbit—that is, if ever she’d go from voluptuous to fat—could survive in skinny jeans.

Bobson has mostly skinny jeans and doesn’t have the bootcut style for women. If ever I’d insist on wearing one of its jeans, I have to go to its men’s section which at least has the “friendlier” styles.

Unlike other jeans which are sewn with seven to nine stitches per inch, Bobson is made with 11. Thus, giving the fatty, er, voluptuous a more durable pair that won’t give up on us if ever our mile-wide hips would bloat to a bigger size. Water retention, anyone?

Years ago, I was at city hall to pay taxes and made chika with one of its personnel. She also had mile-wide hips and I asked her about the brand of jeans she was wearing. She said, Pazzo. And that it’s only available at SM department store in Cebu. Then, we both whined and complained about how hard it was to find our size in CDO stores. I was happy—at last, here’s someone I could share my woes with.

I don’t remember anymore if I fell in love with Pazzo right here at SM CDO or at SM Cebu but finally, I found a brand that always has my size. Even if I gain ten pounds, I could still wear the same Pazzo jean size, and I don’t have any idea how that’s possible.

Years later, I read the city hall employee’s name mentioned in a community paper’s banner news story—she allegedly did some hocus-pocus with her cash collections and fled before authorities could catch her. Oh my gas.

During the Bobson boutique’s opening at LKK, Japanese food was served of course, care of the yummy Ramen Tei. There was a time when I could use chopsticks like I was born with it. Now, I don’t know if it’s old age—non-flexible joints and fingers—that’s making me so clumsy, I could hardly pick any food with it. Thanks to a video where a Japanese chef said that the right way to eat sushi is by using one’s fingers—clean fingers—that’s one less food group to be clumsy with.

But I’m now planning to use chopsticks in eating all food groups, including burgers. Let’s go back to a phrase in the above paragraph—I could hardly pick any food with it. Aha! Weight Loss Secret 101!