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Jingle all the way

Netnet Camomot

ALL these parties are making me sleepy the whole day after. But then, there’s another party to go to on that next day, and the sleeplessness goes on and on and on… Zzzzz…

But the party itself keeps me awake, with its lechon, parlor games, and dress code, thus, the celebration continues.

Dress code? At the last one, it was gods and goddesses. I Googled that on the way to the party, only to realize I had it all wrong—I was in a fuchsia top and black slacks. I was planning to buy a headdress at SM to at least have a goddess outfit to lessen the impact of fats around the face, but it was a Sunday afternoon, and you know how SM is on a Sunday exactly two weeks before Christmas Day.

Meanwhile, a lapinig is building a castle on the window pane attached to the room with a view, and I wonder if it’s politically correct to ask the bug to please construct its abode on a more appropriate pane.

How do these bugs choose their home’s location, anyway? Do they also follow the real estate rule on location, location, location?

Which may give us hints on where to hold a party. Yes, it’s also about location, location, location. The place where each guest can let his hair down and party the night away. Much like that office in the movie, “Office Christmas Party,” where drinks are served in three huge water coolers labeled with “Tequila,” “Vodka,” and “Gin.” And there’s the eggnog flowing through what looks like an icy version of a male protruding “extremity.” Wheeeee!

With less than two weeks before Christmas, the frenzied atmosphere is starting to invade the malls, add traffic to that and it’s “jingle all the way!”

The exchange gift remains challenging: What to buy for a minimum amount of P200 or P300? You will always have the best gift in mind and heart, but with the madding crowd at the mall, better pick the item nearest to you and the cash register.

The most tempting idea now is to postpone the gift-giving to January. You will have a relaxed schedule by then, with hopefully less traffic to deal with and more time to choose gifts.

For the friend who has everything, it may seem like he has everything, but the truth is, he doesn’t have everything. Find out what he lacks, and give it to him—it could be as simple and as deep as a hug.

For the friend who doesn’t have everything, don’t try to fill his life with the material things which you believe he lacks. Most probably, he’s already content with what he has, and your adding to his present batch of possessions will only complicate his life.

For the foodie, an item described as food does not necessarily qualify that as his most appreciated gift. And don’t give foie gras to one who hates liver, especially if he’s also into animal rights. Foie gras is made possible by all these inhumane acts done to a goose, which may prompt human rights advocates to rally and shout, Extrajudicial killings!, if done to human beings.

But then, you see how a pig morphs into a lechon, and that may encourage you to totally morph into a vegan.

For the bookworm, don’t presume he reads J.K. Rowling’s books. Give him a bookstore gift certificate so he can choose the book at his own leisure. Hint! Hint!

That bookworm may not have time to read, but one more additional book for his shelves of unread books will still be much appreciated.

And for the friend who collects piggies, a cute piggy is always much appreciated, too. Hint! Hint!

Buying a gift can be fun, if only there’s less traffic on the streets, and no madding crowd at the malls. But by this time, there’s more traffic, and the mall’s crowd is madding-er. Should have started shopping for gifts in September when the Pinas’ long holiday season began.

The movie, “Office Christmas Party,” may awaken you to the real meaning of the season, that it’s about letting go and savoring life, family and friendship, and a guest using Christmas lights as vines a la Tarzan. It reminds you of the pressure to have the best party ever, the kind you’ll remember for many years. Do you find yourself still talking about that party you had 30 years ago? Yup, that kind of party.

But age may also remind you of the limits your health can now bear—less red meat, less drinks, less late nights. A hangover for the “aged” could last a day or two, with the brain remaining blah and duh, which is the last thing you’ll need if you’re again preparing for another Christmas party the night after that other Christmas party.

This season, though, is the result of Realization 101. It feels free. Free is a word that may not be familiar with those who are still, hmmm, not free.

Well, there’s no harm in trying to describe free. You look out the window, there’s the lapinig still building his castle on the pane, you see the trees, the weather is sunny, sky is clearer with less cotton balls, er, clouds, birds are chirping, and aside from that chirp, the only other sound you hear is the soft whirring of the cute fan that’s keeping the laptop cool.

And then, your thought bubble: the lapinig is probably building a party venue right on your window pane. Will he also serve tequila, vodka, and gin?


About Netnet Camomot

Netnet Camomot once edited a society page and covered society stories for another newspaper. She has long been writing about the lighter side of anything under the sun, including pressing issues of the day, with a touch of humor.

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