Team Survivor

By Netnet Camomot

IF you think Team Buhay and Team Patay are contestants in the TV series “Survivor,” well, you could be right—that’s surviving in the May 2013 election.

The Diocese of Bacolod decided to get its message across by putting a tarpaulin billboard in front of the San Sebastian Cathedral. The tarpaulin had the names of the pro- and antieproductive health (RH) senatorial candidates and party-lists, with the pro- listed under Team Patay and the anti- under Team Buhay.

Just when I thought anything is possible in the midst of Pope Benedict XVI’s resignation, the Diocese of Bacolod seems to stress the quote that “the more things change, the more they remain the same.”

If the Catholic vote still exists, then Team Patay members should quiver with fear because there’s no way they could win with the word “patay” attached to their names. It’s much like “American Idol’s” Sudden Death round—once a contestant fails to make it to the Top 20 this year, will his survival instinct push him to try again next year? As for the Philippine election, it’s not next year but three years later. Oh, the waiting. Whew.

Anyone running in the election wants nothing but victory—they’re there to win and not merely to shake the hands of potential voters without bathing their hands with alcohol right after. Just imagine losing this year, and going through the same path in 2016. Try and try until you… patay, er, succeed?

But if the Catholic vote doesn’t exist anymore, being a Team Patay member won’t matter. I’ve seen that tarpaulin on Facebook, TV, newspapers, and yet I can’t memorize the names of both teams.

Senatorial candidate Cynthia Villar is even part of Team Buhay but after her reply to Winnie Monsod’s question in GMA 7’s “Pagsubok sa mga Kandidato,” perhaps Villar herself is saying, Patay!

Monsod’s query was on epic failure nursing schools: “How can you reconcile the seeming disconnect [between] ’yung desire ninyo to help the poor at saka yung pagpapanig niyo sa mga owners ng mga educational institutions na gustong isara…”

This was Villar’s reply: “Ang sinasabi namin sa kanila na actually, hindi naman kailangan ng nurse na matapos ang BSN (BS Nursing). Kasi itong mga nurses, gusto lang nilang maging room nurse. (Kasi) sa Amerika or sa other countries, ano lang sila parang mag-aalaga… Hindi naman kailangan silang maging ganong kagaling.” To which the nurses could have replied with Willie Revillame’s “You don’t do that to me!”

But Revillame’s words had nothing to do with Villar, Monsod or the nurses. He was simply teaching Ethel Booba and Ate Gay a lesson in his noontime show “Wowowillie.”

There’s this portion in the show that’s titled “Mini-Concierto,” kind of a costume contest among his female co-hosts. It all started when Revillame compared Booba’s attire with that of Anne Curtis’s in “ASAP”: “Style ba ’yan? Ginagaya mo lang si Anne Curtis eh… Wala, ginagaya lang si Anne Curtis. Kasi ’yung suot niya sa ‘ASAP,’ may shower pa. Hindi niyo kaya ’yon. Huwag kayong mag-ilusyon.”

Booba didn’t like the comparison so she replied with, “Ano ito? Bakit mo kami ikino-compare doon? We’re talking about talent, not singit. Come on!”

The verbal exchange didn’t end there. It continued in the dressing room where Booba reportedly shouted at Revillame: “Bakit mo ko ginaganon?”

Eventually, Revillame told Booba, “You don’t do that to me kasi ako ang nagbigay sa ’yo ng pagkakataon sa buhay. If you want to resign, go! Inaangat kita (tapos) ganyan ang gagawin mo sa akin.” For Ate Gay, this was his “advice”: “Binigyan kita ng break. Magkaroon ka ng utang na loob!” Hmmm. Talk of rubbing it in.

Well, I gotta feeling such verbal exchanges will also become the norm between political wannabes and their “sponsors” once the campaign season’s “Survivor” episodes have begun.