Walang hanggan

Netnet Camomot . 

WHEN the world begins to sway, the senior panics and asks, Heart palpitations? Hypertension? He blames his afflictions rather than the more obvious cause: an earthquake.

If that earthquake happened on Valentine’s Day, well, it must be Sting having tantric sex which could be summed up as, Hanggang kailan kaya ito matatapos? And that should have been the title of the movie, “Hanggang Kailan,” as it dragged on and on for almost two hours. We began to suspect it’s a travel video of Japan where it was filmed. Thanks to Louise delos Reyes, who plays the lead female character Kath, for carrying the movie till the end otherwise it would have been an absolute blah.

“BuyBust” director Erik Matti posted on Facebook last week that “several local movies were screened, including one of ours, and it didn’t make good business despite all the marketing fanfare.” Well, he doesn’t have to look far for the reason why.

“Hanggang Kailan” did have its hugot lines, if only the long and winding scenes were cut to make the film short and bittersweet.

This must be the teleserye syndrome. A teleserye also tends to go on and on as long as it continues to have high ratings and attracts advertisers.

For the Election 2019 campaign, it’s the speeches that drone on and on until they taste like the food served at campaign sorties. If their caterer is vegan, it would be difficult to encourage political candidates and their captive audiences to switch to a vegan diet since such sorties require loads of energy, unless their potential voter is Pope Francis who may turn vegan once he accepts the offer of animal rights campaigner Genesis Butler.

Butler, together with the Million Dollar Vegan non-profit campaign, sent a letter to Pope Francis, asking him to adopt a vegan diet during Lent, and if he does, $1 million would be donated to a charity of his choice.

12-year-old Butler has been a vegan since she was 6. Let her be your inspiration as you struggle to stick to your New Year’s resolution to lose weight. Adopt a vegan diet, too, at least for Lent with no less than Pope Francis as your diet buddy.

But what the Pope could be focusing on now is the repercussion of his admission that “there have been priests and bishops” who sexually abused nuns.

There are jokes about priests and nuns which we hoped would remain as jokes but they have become the truth and nothing but the truth. Tsk tsk. When priests morph into pedophiles, though, is that even worse than the priest-and-nun story?

I don’t know if a vegan diet could help the Pope in leading the Catholic Church which, by the way, is run by human beings, in case you haven’t noticed. Human beings who are not perfect like us, the madlang pehpohl. But since they have the responsibility to be perfect examples of piety and compassion in this oh so cruel world, they’re also expected to be honest and trustworthy—too many vows, values and principles heaped on their shoulders, add celibacy to that, and that’s a holier-than-thou disaster waiting to happen.

And here’s another disaster waiting to happen: a 60-year-old smoker who continues to smoke a pack of cigarettes daily since he was, say, 15. He should transfer to Hawaii where there’s a bill that seeks to raise the smoking age to 30 in 2020, 40 in 2021, 50 in 2022, 60 in 2023, and 100 in 2024.

Once the bill is approved, only those 100 years old and above will be allowed to smoke in Hawaii by 2024. Imagine a centenarian smoking a cigarette on his 100th birthday as a gift to himself.

Will alcohol also face the same fate in Hawaii? Hmmm.

Alcohol and cigarettes are the perfect pair for a nightlife. But alcohol is bad for the liver, and cigarettes are bad for the lungs. The Lancet, a medical journal, even reported that “the safest level of drinking is none.”

A curious non-drinker has to start somewhere. Once upon a time, it was Pale Pilsen. As the diet creeps in, there’s San Mig Light. For the senior moment, there’s San Mig Apple. Ho-hum.

There’s this particular lady who has a colorful story, and one guy commented, But she doesn’t even drink. Oh, what’s the connect? Is a non-drinker automatically a living saint? Let’s see if that will inspire US House Speaker Nancy Pelosi to clap back like what she did to US President Donald Trump when he delivered his State of the Union address.