FIX Dessert Chocolatier. Can’t Get Knafeh of It.
You’ve been hiding under a rock if you’ve not heard of the Dubai Knafeh chocolate bars yet.
And you’ll be hiding under a rock again if you’ve bought one. At P2,598 each at a store here in Cagayan de Oro, you’d rather binge in secret, and make sure it’s consumed within three days per its wrapper’s warning: “Give these Heroes the VIP treatment by keeping them refrigerated and indulging in them within three days because they deserve the royal treatment.”
Heroes? VIP? Royal? Are these chocolatey promises tantalizing enough to tempt the carnivore to a taste-test? Will they be worth the side effects?
No sugar is ever worth the side effects. Okay, perhaps only Royce Nama Chocolate, which has been my favorite since forever.
To prove sugar is not worth the side effects, here’s this convo last week:
Me: Pagaw lagi ka.
Si Pagaw: Tungod sa sweets. Hehe.
She was still pagaw on Monday but I didn’t ask her anymore why.
And what sweets has she been indulging in? All kinds of bread, plus cookies, biscuits, crackers, 3-in-1 coffee, iced tea, and chocolate drinks. Looking at that list, only the coffee, iced tea, and choco drinks could be considered as sweet, but she still has a hoarse voice because of her carb intake.
Meanwhile, some next-door neighbors have been coughing since last week. My low-carb doctor’s prescription for that would be as simple as this: carnivore diet. That’s it. Absolutely no carbs. And no meds whatsoever.
The beauty of the carnivore diet is its simplicity. Ordering food at a resto, cafe, or fast food outlet requires only one question: Is this food animal-based? If the answer is yes, then go ahead, indulge. If the answer is no, meaning, it’s plant-based, then look for another menu item.
Ask the same question when buying food like the Dubai choco bar: animal or plant? Answer: plant. Uh. What to do? Tsk tsk. Esep-esep din ‘pag may time.
And just when you’re avoiding carbs, even a typhoon’s name now sounds like kakanin. Typhoon Bebinca was renamed Ferdie here in Pinas, but for a while there, I’m sure you were craving for bibingka each time it was mentioned in the news and in social media posts.
Even an exercise may remind you of food: burpees.
The first time I heard of burpees, I thought it’s the plural form of burp.
But it has no connection whatsoever with food. The ever reliable—hehe—Wikipedia says it was “invented in 1939 by US physiologist Royal Huddleston Burpee Sr., who used it in the burpee test to assess fitness.”
Or perhaps it’s connected with food since eating fast may induce burping which could serve as a reminder to do burpees the morning after.
It’s politically correct to be very demure and very mindful of the burp’s sound effects, so, better do burpees instead of eating fast.
In a YouTube video, Dr. Eric Westman, a low-carb doctor, said, “Good food is medicine; bad food requires medicine.” The low-carb dieter should have this tattooed on his palms to constantly remind him of his diet’s perks.
