Yummy pork

Netnet Camomot . 

FRIED tikoy was always the snack on Chinese New Year, thanks to our Chinese classmates who lived in Binondo, Manila. These were the same classmates who brought photocopies of US newspapers from Clark Air Base that had details of Ninoy Aquino’s assassination in 1983. The Philippine media was controlled then and newspapers were afraid of printing the real story behind the headlines.

These Chinese classmates were among the who’s who of Binondo, with houses and stores that looked like warehouses from the outside but wait until you reached the top floors and—voila!—a minimalist mansion existed therein. Such a pleasant surprise. Don’t judge a book by its cover indeed.

2019 is the Year of the Pig and pigs could only wish they won’t end up on the buffet table this year.

It seems like pigs, er, pork is also the centerpiece of the P3.8-trillion proposed budget for 2019 with P160 million for each congressman, as revealed by Sen. Ping Lacson. Some of his detractors may react to this with a, Look who’s talking! Well, is it possible for P10 billion of that to morph into another pork barrel scam a la Janet Lim-Napoles? That’s the question. With alleged pork barrel scammers—former Senators Juan Ponce Enrile, Jinggoy Estrada and Bong Revilla—now as free as the birds that have returned to the partially rehabilitated Manila Bay, the pork barrel scam has not exactly served as a lesson learned for Pinas. It was only a temporary snag in the grafting and corrupting world of some Pinoy politicians, as temporary as the end of the US government shutdown.

Have you ever had a total of P160 million in your bank accounts? How about P16 million? P1.6 million? P160 thousand? P16,000? P1,600? The amount shrinks as the zeros disappear.

Cash is easy to spend. P1.4 million can be gone in a day if you waste it all in a casino. Or even more? Que horror! Some filthy rich politicians allegedly have this habit of bringing boxes of cold hard cash to casinos. Or for building mansions outside of the Philippines and their hometown, or wherever they can hide their assets.

But then, there’s the Pinoy who has absolutely accepted the “alleged” fact that politicians have standard operating procedures (SOP) when it comes to budgets and projects in the form of the ever present commission—allegedly, reportedly, supposedly. With the madlang pehpohl always suspicious of transactions created behind closed doors, the realistic Pinoy has learned to hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil as long as government-funded infrastructure won’t literally crush down on anyone who happens to be there in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Newly constructed school buildings, bridges, roads, basketball courts, barangay halls, etc. always look nice when they’re new. Wait for a few months and, uh-oh, good luck na lang. Rest rooms with damaged faucets and doors, or with no toilet partitions. Toilets that don’t flush. A septic tank that’s of the same height as the rest room—I’m not an engineer, so, I have no idea if that’s a generally accepted engineering principle.

The tired Pinoy has no time to solve the government’s woes since he’s also busy trying to find solutions for his own problems. He becomes so used to stories about politicians and their SOP and commissions, he decides to focus on his self instead, bahala na si Batman with the government. Besides, he already had People Power in 1986—how many times should a peaceful revolution be resurrected to oust another president? Been there, done that. Ho-hum.

In 1986, it was Dilawan versus the Marcoses. Thirty years later, it’s Dilawan versus the Dutertards. Thirty years from now, it will be the Dilawan versus who? The answer to that is this: the common denominator between the Marcoses and the Dutertards.

A political candidate’s goal is seldom genuine service for the madlang pehpohl. His public relations (PR) machinery of course harps on his good heart and his desire to serve but that’s usually a PR ploy to garner votes, with the assumption that there’s at least one gullible voter who will believe all that jazz.

The cynical and skeptical voter can only hope that he’s voting for the candidate with the least potential for graft and corruption. Yeah, dream on.

Not all politicians and political candidates are corrupt, though. But how to know who’s not?

The potential candidate, who may be more qualified than the usual candidate, won’t even dare run due to lack of funds and connections. His fear to run paves the way for the traditional politician (trapo) to win again and again, with the same surnames campaigning in each election.

“Give chance to others” is an advice that can be absorbed only by the trapo whose immediate family and close relatives are not willing to take his place once he has reached his maximum term limit. So, he finally gives chance to others, preferably one of his closest and most trusted friends. Especially the friend who gives him fried tikoy on Chinese New Year. Yum!

Kung Hei Fat Choi!

And fat is exactly what you’ll be if you think the Year of the Pig means eating lots of pork.