Half and half

Netnet Camomot

THE best way to put your message across is to boycott or to go out there and shout at the top of your lungs. Doing things halfway never gets you anywhere. It’s either 100 percent or 0 percent, black or white, naa o wala.

Like sex, for example. You’re already making out, why not go all the way? Why only, hmmm, 50 percent, if you can go for 100? That 50 percent will leave you hanging on to the what-if. Such a waste of time thinking of what could have been, how it would have felt like.

But then, sex is not for everyone, especially the young ones who are not ready to face the consequences.

Besides, when the invite has 50-percent enthusiasm on the part of the inviter, there’s a possibility the event he’s hesitatingly inviting you to is not worth it at all.

And then, there are times when you have to act like a puppy in order to get what you want. Kanang itoy ba nga gasunod-sunod sa bukog that’s being dangled over his face. Ilang talon na lang, he could get it na. But the one holding the bone will never allow that to happen. So, there’s the kawawang puppy, leaping and jumping, hoping to finally embed his fangs on the bone.

Flexibility is one key to success. Hey, it even works for sex. But since private moments are not supposed to be discussed in public, unless there’s domestic abuse involved there, then let’s focus on success.

The puppy who has learned to jump in order to win the bone will probably end up as the most successful puppy in the world. He’s flexible, he can play the game, he can kiss a**, as many a**es as it takes to win the bone. There will come a time when he won’t recognize himself anymore. He looks in the mirror and asks, Who’s that puppy? For he now resembles the many a**es he has kissed.

You look at his eyes and they’re empty. Empty pools of water and these black circles in the middle with red streaks surrounding them. But people look up to him, respect him for his achievements, power, and money. He’s the epitome of success.

If you’re the type who follows this corny belief that the heart tells you everything, that puppy will never understand you. The puppy has analyzed and discerned and asked the heavens for faith, he can no longer relate with your simple thoughts on God, faith, love, inner core, gut instinct, the heart. Especially if one of the first things you do in the morning is to sit, stare at the trees, listen to the birds chirping while having breakfast. You simplify other areas of your life because there are things that have remained complicated despite…

But no one wants to be called a puppy, no matter how cute that puppy is. A person is a human being after all. He’s not an animal, as Boy Abunda stressed in reaction to Manny Pacquiao’s declarations on “masahol pa sa hayop” the pehpohl who are in same-sex relationships.

But if you look closely, animals are better off when it comes to planning their life. They see snow, they frolic. They see food they like, they eat it. They sense an enemy approaching, they strike first. No thoughts of, Oh, what would my fellow animals say?

Human beings tend to think too much. Way too much. Instead of focusing on what they need, they wait and see what others have to say. If there’s one person you have to live with for the rest of your life, it’s you. You alone. Of course there are and will always be pehpohl around you for “No man is an island,” as the saying goes, but at the end of the day, there’s you, alone. No one will help you rise to the heavens when the time comes, you will have to climb and reach that bright light by yourself, no one will be there to push your a**.

So, why does it matter now what the other thinks and says? Will he be there to push your a** towards that bright light in the end?

The question is, What do you want anyway? Or, if you’ve gone deeper, what do you need? Less stress? OK, I will distance myself from you because I gotta feeling that stress you’re referring to is me.

And before anyone starts to suspect this is about him, her, or them, here’s a disclaimer: No, this is not about last Sunday’s presidential debate in Cagayan de Oro. It may sound like it is, but it’s De. Fi. Nite. Ly. Not.

And here’s the reason why it’s not. On Sunday afternoon, my sis and I were on our way to SM for some last-minute grocery shopping–aka gotta insert it in the sked–when one of us–I don’t remember who–mentioned that debate. To test her commitment to news updates, I asked her if she knew where the venue is, and she said, No. Haha! That’s how politically updated our family is.

I had the opportunity to be at the debate–well, it knocked once. But I said no so I could finish all the work that had deadlines looming overhead for this month. The trip to SM was a much-needed respite.

I’m bringing that work wherever I go now, to assure my minute brain with the belief that, yes, I can make it happen.

And what my sis wanted to happen did happen–JaDine finally revealing to the whole world that they’re in a relationship. That’s how Saturday evening went, with James finally telling Nadine, I love you. Sigh. The cynical and skeptical would, of course, say, Congrats to their PR team! For that’s what it is, right? Public image. Sa mailad lang.

Which could be the exact words coming from those who have been there, done that with watching presidential debates. Sa mailad lang. The only perk you would get out of watching it live is the possibility of having a selfie with your favorite presidentiable. Otherwise, zzzzz, snore, ho-hum.

Then, on Monday morning, while waiting for luggage at the airport’s baggage carousel, there’s Jessica Soho sans makeup and business attire, and since you’re the most spontaneous human being when it comes to celebrity sightings, your aura says it all: that you do recognize her. She had no choice but to wave her hand and say, Hi!

With barely three months more to go before Election Day, you may not want to hear a foreigner pronouncing that as Erection. Election Day, after all, is one of the most important dates in the Philippine arena, third only to Christmas and the fiesta. Thus, let no man pronounce that incorrectly, for Pinoys are ultra-serious with their celebrations. Yup, Election Day is also a celebration. Take note of the last word in guns, goons, and gold.  Gold! There will be gold! Gold is already being distributed as I write this. Sarap ng buhay.

Whoever wins, the best way he can get his message across is to do well and to not have any graft and corruption emitting off his aura. “Actions speak louder than words,” as the saying goes. He could be saying one thing in his campaign sorties while meaning another once he wins.

The wise voter has learned to read between the lines and is also getting his message across by voting for the better candidate.

Better? How about best? Take a good look at the presidentiables. If you believe any of them can be described as best, then go ahead, make your day.