Pikachu!

Netnet Camomot

AUTHORITIES should play Pokemon Go while convincing Pinoy drug pushers and users to surrender. Makes the hunting job less boring.

Surrender remains the better option, for it’s still a comma, compared to annihilation which is a dot at the end of a sentence, complete with, Good riddance!

But can this kind of hunting ever get boring? Thousands have surrendered, with more coming soon to a theater near you.

The government should put up rehab centers ASAP since curbing drug addiction is simply not a matter of surrendering and avoiding shabu while druglords are still out there, ready to provide supply to a demand which can be likened to Claudia’s (Kirsten Dunst) famous line in “Interview With the Vampire”: “I want some more.” More blood for her, that is.

But for the drug addict, it’s more shabu. No matter how many surrenders he makes and how many times he promises to stop, the urge to suyop pa more will always be there unless he fully commits to change his ways which is possible only through a good rehab program.

Change is coming indeed to the drug user whose will and determination to be drug-free are higher than his craving to suyop pa more.

Shabu is always bad news. It has no benefits whatsoever unless you consider a sleepless night great for your 24/7 work.

And if you’re desperate to lose weight, then shabu could be the answer. It will not only help get rid of the excess pounds, it will also make you skinny, with sunken wide-awake eyes and sunken cheeks, and there’s the gray face with pimples, the mouth with no teeth, and the brain hooked on praning. A complete package.

There are many choices a person makes each day. As to why he ends up addicted to shabu, let’s see if a gun was pointed at his head when he did the first suyop. If none, well, he should be careful with the things he says yes to, eh?

One of the reasons for drug use is supposed to be peer pressure: everyone in the group is doing it, might as well join the fun.

Or curiosity: I wonder what it feels like. This is before the phase where a drug user starts to ask, I wonder how it feels like to be hounded by the PDEA and the police. When the truth is, there’s no PDEA or police stalking him. Although that could be true now–if you’re a drug addict and you suspect they’re following every breath you take, you’re right!

Or boredom: Gosh, I have nothing to do. Oh, shabu! Thanks!

Whatever the reason for that first suyop, it’s time to wish you shouldn’t have now that the country’s new president is bent on catching you.

At least one Pinoy showbiz guy has surrendered. His name: Jay-R Siaboc. Yup, the surname sounds like shabu. But I don’t think that’s what pushed him to the first suyop.

He surrendered so he could clear his name from allegations of drug peddling.

There’s a big difference between peddling and using. Peddling means you’re inviting more people to buy drugs, kind of a kumbira. Using means you may invite your barkada to make suyop along with you, so you won’t be, hmmm, lonely?

The mantra of an addict should be bawal mag-share, to stop the drug menace from spreading. But I guess even in drugs, there’s strength in numbers.

One of these days, a cop will be playing Pokemon Go which may lead him to a drug den which he and his colleagues have not discovered yet. Hmmm. Pikaaaaa! Pikachu!