Emojis

Netnet Camomot

SO, he’s a sociopath. For a while there, I kept asking, Why, oh, why? Then, on Tuesday night, I read this piece about empathy, apathy, and sociopaths, and—Voila! Eureka!—finally got it.

No, I’m not referring to President Rody Duterte.

The piece I read said not all sociopaths are in jail. Some of them are roaming the streets, they may even be talking with you right now, and you could be the person with empathy he’s planning to target or the one with apathy he’s luring to his side of the fence. The piece warned that the one with empathy should be careful with sociopaths. Woe to those who read the piece belatedly. Oh, my.

People with apathy, though, are convinced for now about what the sociopath has been telling them. Until, of course, they themselves will become his targets. Wow! Sounds too familiar. I wish I had read that piece way back in, hmmm, 2010. Or should we go much earlier, decades earlier.

Another friend told me she has always been wary of this sociopath, or what I now know as a sociopath. She simply doesn’t like the vibes he emits, no matter how many people those vibes seem to attract, so that there was a time when the people surrounding this particular person were already asking her why she hasn’t joined their group yet. Good for her, she has a high radar against this kind of person.

A sociopath has a personality disorder. I don’t know if a psychiatrist can fix his condition.

Drug addicts, though, can still be fixed if they have the will to be fixed, through rehab, therapy and psychiatry. But it requires their willingness to go through the whole process of healing, and it takes a village, for there’s always the temptation for them to go back to drugs again. They can’t be healed without that willingness, for willingness also means acceptance of their drug addiction.

All healing, from addiction to loss to any other negativity in your life, starts with acceptance. Once you’ve accepted the truth, then you can work with that, and move forward. Denial will bring you nowhere. Say, if you’ve gained a lot of weight but you’re in denial about your weight gain, then you will continue to eat until you’re obese. I’m an emotional eater. I eat when I’m happy, sad, and in-between. Everything is an excuse for eating pa more.

Since the only times I went out of the house in the last two months were during the two checkups with my orthopedic surgeon, I always ask my sis to bring home McDo McChicken sandwich, fries, and Coke Zero for me whenever she’s grocery shopping. And to buy mongo hopia and roasted peanuts. Comfort food.

Waking up in the morning has me fighting this urge to have rice and processed food for breakfast again, but I always have that, with fried eggs. Yesterday morning, I had rice, Spam, fried egg, banana, and downed that with sambong tea to lessen the guilt.

I’ve lost count of the number of times I resolved not to eat rice anymore. The banana is supposed to be its substitute but it ends up as dessert.

Now that S&R is here, my sis-in-law is among the happiest in the world. She has quinoa in lieu of rice, and S&R sells it cheaper than the supermarkets here. I tried quinoa once and decided, No, I don’t want that much punishment. Haha!

I can’t go on a diet yet, since the healing knee needs nutrients. Nutrients in processed food? Oh, please bear with me. I’ve been living within these four walls for many weeks, some processed food won’t hurt.

But lose weight I must, to give the healing knee less stress. I’ve already prayed through the intercession of Tito Lolong for the knee’s healing, but anyone who has tried prayers knows that medical and/or non-medical interventions are also necessary. That’s where God and Tito Lolong guided me, so I availed of everything that the doctors prescribed—pain relievers, anti-inflammation meds, arthroscopy, wheelchair, crutches, plateletich plasma injections. I’m an obedient patient.

A patient can’t simply wait for God’s miracles to happen. The patient himself has to be aware of God’s guidance because it can be in many forms. Trust your gut instinct when it comes to the choices to be made.

That’s the same gut instinct which has always told you something’s off with this particular friend. But you ignored it because, well, he’s a close friend, he would always be by your side to support, defend, and be there for you. Only for him to exhibit this shocking reveal that instead of supporting you, he would be the first to leave your side. Instead of defending you, he would tell other people lies about you. Instead of being there for you, well, he’s not there for you.

The new Philippine administration has also tested the Pinoy’s gut instinct. With all these shocking reveals bombarding us daily, who to believe? Are we on our way to another round with martial law? A dictatorship?

But the Pinay matrona is now stuck with this news: The 50-ish former justice secretary/incumbent lady senator has a new boyfriend and his name, according to Pres. Duterte, is Warren. Here I am, focusing on healing the knee, and there she is, with a new boyfriend. Should I say, life is unfair?

But life is indeed fair. She may have a new boyfriend but she’s still in a dilemma which she may not be able to fix soon. It’s an uphill—downhill?—climb from hereon, despite her attempts at shifting the focus to the Senate’s investigation in aid of legislation on extrajudicial killings. Angry emojis continue to pepper any live TV and Facebook coverage which stars her. A like, a wow or heart emoji enters the picture only when it’s inadvertently clicked by a finger busy in catching a Pokemon. But for the determined finger, angry emojis abound all throughout the live coverage.