We always have a choice

Maria Christina Concepcion

“THE mind can only entertain one thought at a time…” I’ve heard about this many years ago and I agree.

I remember the time when we were on a boat on our trip home from Cebu and we were in the economy accommodation. The sea that particular night was restless. It was raining, the waves were huge and the boat was literally tossing to and fro. I was nervous; no, I was afraid. You see, I have always been afraid of big waves and boat rides and my family knows about it. In their desire to comfort me, my children held my hand and brought me inside the ship’s lobby where the reception desk was. Then we sat in one of the lounge chairs, away from the wind and the rain and the sound of the waves. My children started to tell me stories and jokes and I knew they were trying to take my mind off my worries and fear. I saw that they were not afraid, not one bit, but I was and there was no denying it. I knew they were trying to make me feel better and as their mother, I felt ashamed that the tables have turned. I was supposed to be their source of strength, not the other way around.

Then I remembered that “the mind can only entertain one thought at a time”. I realized I needed to replace my worries with something else, something constructive and positive. So I started to sing a song, silently in my mind. It has always worked in the past and I knew it will always work.

True enough, as my mind began to focus on the lyrics of the song I have chosen, a warm feeling enveloped me and I began to feel better. I silently sang one song after another, mostly songs I used to sing to my children. The songs came one after another–one my Mom used to sing to me and to my younger sisters, another song about the spider going up the water spout, one song on counting our blessings, another song on where to find peace, one about doing good to others, one about trying to be like Jesus, one about giving, and even one Christmas song.

More minutes passed and finally, as I felt peace inside my heart, I told my children that I was feeling much better and told them we should all go back to our beds so we can take our rest. It has been a long day after all.

It was still raining outside when we went to our accommodation. The boat was still swaying sideways because of the big waves, but I was feeling much better.

As I finally lay down in the small bed, my hubby, whose bed was beside mine, came closer and held me in his arms, assuring me that things will be alright. I knew we will be safe. I knew someone was looking after us, and besides, it was just me and my unfounded worries and fears.

But boy am I glad that I knew a lot of songs. They truly came in handy when I needed them most. And indeed, the mind can only accommodate one though at a time.

In my boat experience, fear and faith cannot co-exist. If we’re angry at someone or something, the only way to remove the anger is to think of something else, to occupy the mind with another thought, one that’s positive and constructive. Only one thought can take the center stage of our mind. One thought has to stay and one has to go. And in the end, we decide what stays and what goes away. It’s a good thing that we always have a choice.

(Maria Christina Concepcion is a member of the Rotary Club of Kalayaan CDO and is a soft skills trainer.)