Instant germaphobia

By Rhona Canoy

SO… With all the tips and how-tos that are barraging our senses, I’ve been thinking about this notorious virus and how to keep it away. Then I saw this wonderful meme. It said, “Pretend that you have the virus, then think about what you would do to keep from infecting others.” That’s when I realized that I’ve got to become a germophobe if I’m going to do my part in this battle for survival. The following are not tips for you to follow but rather my realizations. But if they make sense to you too, then feel free.

HANDS. Of course, this makes sense. Like all simians, we use our hands for everything. If we are to be cautious, we must be aware of what we do with our hands. It’s true that we can pick up the virus from the surfaces that we touch, from doorknobs to restaurant menus to handshakes. By the same token, we also transfer the virus to those surfaces. Once we become carriers, those microvillains get to go places. We worry too much about being contaminated that we forget we also become their means of transportation. Wash your hands. There are enough instructions on how to do it properly. Go out and buy soap. Don’t fixate on the alcohol. I’ve taken to carrying a small bottle of liquid soap in my bag, along with the alcohol.

THINGS. We often don’t think about the things we carry or take with us when we have to go out. I laid out all my stuff on the table and took a good hard look. I was truly horrified. We wash our hands so diligently but don’t take into account all the things we have with us. Those need to be wiped down with alcohol too. Cellphones: please wipe down the whole phone, not just the screen. Because we hold it with our hands. So do the whole phone. Women’s wallets: oh yes. The second most-frequently touched item. Please wipe down the entire outside of the wallet, and don’t forget the zipper pull tab. The same goes for our bags. I stopped using leather purses because those don’t take well to alcohol. Now I’m happily using a cheap vinyl one. And don’t forget to do the car keys.

ATMs AND TOUCHSCREENS. Think about it. Everyone must avail of the services of that money machine. We stand in line without thinking about it. As a courtesy and ignoring the impatient glares of the persons behind me, I will take an extra minute to wipe down the touch screen and the keypad with a cotton ball doused with alcohol. Otherwise, I make sure to have the alcohol ready to squirt on my hands right after I use the machine. I try to only have one hand make contact.

HAIR. I got to thinking about my hair. Those virus-laden droplets somehow manage to float about in the air for a limited time, attaching itself to anything and everything that comes their way. Plus, women have this unconscious habit of stroking their hair, especially when they think some man is looking. Guess what? Those droplets can take a ride on the Rapunzel locks as well. So I figure this is not the time for vanity. I’m going to get my hair cut.

SKIN. We never think about our exposed skin. But the virus can get a ride there too. So that every time we touch ourselves, we bring Covid nearer to our cranial orifices. Think about it. Arms and legs fly under the radar. I see so many females wandering around wearing those Daisy Maes (very tiny denim shorts, to the uninitiated) and every once in a while they stroke their legs or arms, not considering that there may be a colony of viruses already attached there. I figure I only go out when I have to, wear jeans and a long-sleeved shirt, and take a bath as soon as I get home.

FEET AND FOOTWEAR. Think about it. Those droplets are heavy. That’s why Covid is not airborne. They’re only in the air for the finite amount of time that they’ve been ejected from someone’s infected mouth. Then, where must they go? Obviously, sink to the floor or ground. Where thousands of shoes and feet in flipflops will walk over them and where they will attach themselves to be transported to another location, and finally end up in our homes. Solution? Do what lolo and lola used to do. Leave my outside footwear outside. Don’t wear them into the house. Otherwise, frequently mop the floor with disinfectant. Keep my indoor tsinelas indoors. And wash my feet as soon as I get home. That’s why it makes sense to head straight to the bathroom and scrub down.

VISITORS AND HOUSEHELP. Because our house person doesn’t live with us, I’ve started to require him—and anyone who comes to visit—to first wash their hands, at the very least. I figure that it’s my irresponsibility if I should be lenient with others, but my dad is almost 91 years old and I’d hate it if Covid got him because we were not careful. And to leave their footwear outside.

CARS. Let’s not forget. Car door hands, both inside and outside. The dashboard. The radio dial. The seat belt buckles and traps.  Basically the whole car. That needs to be wiped down once in a while. And spray Lysol into the airconditioning vents. After all, we do love our cool comfort. Keep a roll of tissue paper in there (oh, that’s what it’s all about!) and a small bottle of alcohol to use for wipedowns

Every day, my list gets a bit longer. And it’s worse for me because it’s rhinitis season. There are many who can relate. The trees and plants around our house have made sure that we are now scary people—my dad, my brother, and I. Runny nose, frequent sneezing, clearing the throat. It’s more than enough for people to want to keep their distance. Maybe it’s a good thing.